A conversation with my daughter the other evening. (We call her Sissy, short for sister.)
Me: Sissy, turn off the ipad please.
Sissy: (IGNORES ME)
Me: (Louder) Sissy, turn off the ipad.
Sissy: Why?
Me: Because it’s time for us to get ready to get in the car.
Sissy: What?
Me: It’s time for us to leave, now please turn it off! (Yes, my voice is already raised)
Sissy: WHY? (Yes, she’s whining at this point.)
Me: Because we need to leave! You cannot bring it along. Turn it off please!
Sissy: Ohhh….WHY? (Whining and dragging her feet as she hands the ipad to me.)
Then I feel the Holy Spirit kick in. And I KNOW (don’t ask me how, I just know) that God is up there laughing at me. Because He knows I’m finally getting the message.
How often, when we hear God’s desires, do we ask “why”? How often, do we drag our feet and whine before/while doing His will?
I had the amazing, fulfilling, and refreshing experience of attending the IF:Gathering this weekend. If you don’t know about IF, I highly recommend you look into it. Women of Christ, gathering together, to praise our Lord. Their mission statement: We exist to gather, equip, and unleash the next generation of women to live out their purpose. I can promise you will feel the Holy Spirit moving. God has wonderful plans set in motion.
As I sat there for the broadcast Friday evening and Saturday, I was introduced to a new world of speakers, authors, and women in my church I hadn’t had the chance of meeting until then. A few of them shared their backgrounds. And they were full of what I would consider big, miraculous details. Trials. Rough backgrounds. Broken relationships that healed. God was so apparent in their stories. But I didn’t share. Because my story wasn’t as “full” as theirs were. I didn’t have any God stories to share, because for the 15 years following my baptism, I had put God on the back burner.
I had accepted Jesus at a Christian wilderness summer camp when I was 14. I was baptised the next summer by anointing with water. And then I went on with life as I knew it: high school, babysitting, college. I was surrounded with Christians of all denominations; wonderful, caring people who love the Lord. A strong family that put God first. But I personally failed to realize what a relationship with Christ meant. I didn’t spend time praying (except for the recited “God is great” at meal and the evening “Thank you God for today” habit) My involvement with the church (youth, children’s choir, worship committee) was all external - nothing was changing inside of me.
Romans 12:2 says “Do not be conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewal of your mind,
that by testing you may discern what is the will of God,
what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Even though I was baptized, my mindset was still that of the world. I had asked Jesus into my heart, but I failed on following through with what that meant- nurturing that relationship with Him! I worried about how I dressed, fussed over make-up and hair and the body God gifted me, tried to be “cool”, and attempted to box myself into one social group. The result was something of an identity crisis. I didn’t know where I fit. I didn’t know who I was. A real life nightmare is feeling like you don’t belong anywhere.
Driving home from the IF:Gathering, I spoke with God. I know every story is important, but mine seems so much “less”, because I hadn’t pursued that personal relationship with Christ. For 15 years, I’d basically ignored all the wonderful gifts He had given me; that He wants to give each of us.
Then He showed me: the GOOD NEWS is that through His grace, I woke up. While I had put Jesus on that back burner, he had never left me, and He still loved me just as much as ever. And I feel like He wakes me up a little more whenever I spend time in HIS WORD. And I feel his Holy Spirit moving when I spent time in PRAYER with Him. And I feel His love for us. The best part; I have an identity. I KNOW who I am. I am His. I am a child of God. And there is nothing in the world that even comes close to knowing Him on a personal level. This was my story. My story is now HIS story.
Back to that conversation I had with my daughter and how I relate it to us dragging our feet, whining, and the will of God. Sissy hit me with the "lesson" and the Holy Spirit hit me with “share the story”. (See photo below)
Share??!!
I don’t understand why, but I felt overly compelled to share this story with our youth group. It would be my second time speaking to them in the year I’ve worked with them.
Why Lord? Why?
You made me; you know better than anyone
that I cannot bear
to stand in front of a group of people,
let alone speak to a group
for any length of time.
I was able to drag my feet for a good 8 hours or so… then I gave in. Holy spirit 2, Mandy 0. Well, that’s not true… it’s more like Holy Spirit ∞, Mandy 0. But that’s okay; if I want a relationship with God, I’ve got to be willing to do His will.
Mark 3:35 “For whoever does the will of God, he is my brother and sister and mother.”
I am NOT a SPEAKER, but in GOD’S NAME I can DO THIS. And in GOD’S NAME, you can do what He is calling you to do.
1 Corinthians 3:16
“Don’t you know that you yourselves
are God’s temple
and that God’s spirit lives in you?”
1 Corinthians 1:27
But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise;
God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.
He chose the lowly things of this world
and the despised things
and the things that are not-
to nullify the things that are,
so that no one may boast before him.
Verse 31
Let Him who boasts, boast in the Lord.
I’m praying that in sharing this story, the Holy Spirit speaks to you. That, if you are hurting, you run to Jesus for comfort. And that if you are struggling, you give it to God and trust in His strength and will.
Forever in Him.
Amen. Amen.
